I sat as still as possible.
Maybe if I didn't make any sudden movements the thought would vanish.
No, you can't open the door.
No, you can't jump.
No, you can't pray that if you do, you wouldn't suffer for long.
You simply can't do it.
Especially not with them in the car with you...
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So, so true. I know this feeling, and you are absolutely right. YOU CAN'T. Keep fighting, Pamela.
ReplyDeleteOK, this is the third time i have tried to post this.
ReplyDeleteYou are too beautiful, too courageous, too wonderful and inspiring in your writing, in the messages you give out, too supportive, too kind and too truly awesome in so many ways for you to even contemplate this scenario.
I will not let you disappear or fade away. I am listening and i hear you. I HEAR YOU. times are hard but you are doing it every minute of every day is another achievement.
Thoughts are not facts.
It doesnt mean you cant think them but they dont need to come true.
Feelings also arent facts.
You are allowed to feel them but you can allow them to pass.
I love thee, i need thee, and i am holding your hand every step of the way YOU ARE NOT ALONE AND I CAN HEAR YOU.
do not make me travel across the atlantic to tell you off, i will come for a hug though one day, you mark my words.
Now as much as i love this deeply dark and truly inspirational writing, it has me worried.
You know where i am.
I love thee muchly xxxx
Ps - THOUGHTS ARENT FACTS AND I CAN HEAR YOU.
I can hear. I just don't know how to help. :( But every time you stop - every time you don't do it - I cheer. Keep going.
ReplyDeleteKeep fighting it. You'll get there. It won't beat you. It hasn't beaten me and I bet you're much stronger than me ;-)
ReplyDeleteWhat the others wrote before me is perfect, and I am also cheering you on, wishing I could help in a more profound way that you can actually see and feel.
ReplyDeleteHold on tight...it's a bumpy ride, but you CAN do it! Hey, you're blogging about it, right? That means we are all waiting to hear that bit of positive news...that next blog entry that says you found a little peace today (even for a nanosecond). Hang in there!!
ReplyDeleteI'm not a sufferer so you can tell me to bog off. However, one of my best mates is, and my dad and sister have suffered with depression. You can only take one step at a time, get through one event at a time. Keep your head up and your eyes on the prize, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, you will reach it.
ReplyDelete